If you see a man dressed as a butcher driving a white van stop by and say hello. I totally remembered to buy candy this year.… Read More

Happy Halloween Everyone! Also don’t forget to check your candy for razor blades and anthrax.… Read More

I’ll be handing out Chick Tracts to all the kids to make sure that nobody has any fun tonight. Except for me because I’ll be drunk.… Read More

Hey, did Green Day write any songs about October ending?… Read More

It’s Halloween, which means the police are going to have to decide whether to beat protesters or drunk college students.… Read More

You know you’re white when you go to a rave at a golf course instead of an abandoned warehouse.… Read More